Family Recipes are as Important as Keeping Family Photos
You’re walking down the street past shops and little restaurants, the sun is out and you’re on your way to some specific destination. You hear the sounds of people laughing on the patio in front of you, and the smells of their lunch arriving meets your nose.
Without even knowing why, you’re remembering a family dinner from your childhood. Everyone laughing, your grandmother bringing out that one specific dish that always made your mouth water and your belly warm.
Then you’re remembering when she made it for you when you were in college, or a birthday.
You remember wanting to learn how to make it and sliding up next to her in the kitchen asking to help and watching her every move as she carefully pulled all of the ingredients together.
You remember making it for the family after she passed away. The smiles and joy that showed up that night as everyone shared their memories.
Food and Emotional Connections
It’s no wonder that we eat to feel better or to calm our nerves. We associate so many different things with various foods and emotional states. The way our brains are wired has a lot to do with that, but we’re not going to go there today.
We’re talking about how food keeps families and friends close. It’s how we connect with others, make peace, kindle love, and nurture ourselves. It’s how we celebrate holidays, special occasions, and life itself.
Religious and spiritual practices have been “breaking bread” in their own ways for millennia. It’s a part of who we are as humans. We have to eat!
All of our senses are involved in eating. The way food looks tells us on an innate level if we’re getting the nutrients that we need. Yellows, reds, greens, etc… all have their own flavors and nutrient profiles. Green will invariably have a bitter flavor. Is that why so many people dislike green foods?
Maybe it has to do with the amount of sugar in our diets and bitter no longer has positive associations on our palate. It’s a curious thing that happens when you take sugar out of your diet, how greens change in their taste, they even get a little sweet!
But I digress…Our sense of smell; which is the first sense to develop fully while we’re still in our mother’s belly, plays another important role in our relationship with food. How something smells creates deep associations that are stimulated long before the food touches our lips.
How does hearing relate to our food?! Well, I might have to reach a little on this one, but I would say it has a lot to do with that time at the grocery store when your mom taught you to tap on a watermelon to tell if it was “good?” Hmmm...I’m sure there’s more to this one.
Touch is a big one. You wouldn’t eat that watermelon if your finger went through the rind, right?! Besides telling you if your fruit is overripe, touch is part of how food feels in your mouth.
And when I think about this, I think about a really great loaf of french bread. The crisp edges, how it cracks (ooh! The SOUND!!), and you get to the soft center. You can gently squeeze this bread and know how amazing it will be when you warm it up just right and dip it into seasoned olive oil.
Taste is obvious. When you have all of your tastebuds intact, and have the most wonderfully prepared meal, you can experience how flavors play off of eachother. How the bitterness of spinach and the peppery flavor of arugula dance on your tongue then shift completely with a cranberry or strawberry, and a small flake of parmesan cheese.
All of the senses combined like this light up the brain and have the potential to imbue any emotional experience happening while eating onto the food in front of you. This is part of why emotional eating is a big factor in our lives.
You may have had a parent or grandparent who would give you something “special” when you had a bad day. Or at every celebration a family member would prepare one thing that would always bring back the joy of coming together.
Coconut Cake and Aunt Joan
The inspiration of this post goes to my Aunt Joan and my memories with her. She is my inspiration behind keeping family recipes close. Yes, I know, you thought casseroles were the big family inspiration.
Well, nothing takes the cake quite like Aunt Joan and visiting Daytona Beach to spend time with her.
I have so many family connections to food, now that I think about it. And I think I always will. Even if I can’t see my family, I know they’re with me when I cook. Whether it’s grits, casseroles, or cakes, there are deep connections to so many generations of family in food.
Throughout my childhood, high school, and college Aunt Joan was making Coconut Cake. We even had it at the rehearsal dinner for my wedding. Even though I’m not a coconut lover (in other aspects like coconut water and a fresh coconut, (I do like the occasional Pina colada though), this cake has so many special memories.
To make it, she would bake up some Duncan Hines yellow cake mix and add just a little extra oil. When it was cooled, she would get out a big fork and just start poking holes in the cake.
Sometimes I can’t help laughing when I’m making this myself imagining how excited Aunt Joan would be about getting to fork the cake!!
After her excitement ebbed and the cake was still intact, she would pour Coco Lopez all over it, wrap it up, and let it sit overnight just soaking up the juices.
The next day, before everyone would show up, she’d whip up a fresh batch of thick whipped cream and cover the cake in it. Perfect white peaks hid that delicious cake and then she’d sprinkle sweetened coconut flakes all over that.
I think because I spent so much time with her and my Uncle during my college years that when Aunt Joan passed away, I was the one who received the torch for making the Coconut Cake.
And while my son can out do me making cheesecake, this one is mine.
They say you can feel the love of the cook in every meal they make. And I don’t disagree with this.
Keeping Family Close
Memories like this keep families close, because we can share the stories, recreate the experience and share it. Our kids, nieces, nephews, and even complete strangers can experience the joy of connection and our memories through the food we make.
Notice all of your senses the next time you celebrate with your loved ones, see if you can recall something special and share it with everyone. I promise, it will be remembered, and you will be celebrated too.
Thanks for sharing this memory with me, and I hope you enjoy this amazing cake. Give a toast to Aunt Joan and smile for me. ***Recipe Below***
Cheers!
~Kim
Coconut Cream Cake
The most decadent, moist and easy Coconut Cream Cake makes a perfect dessert for Easter, Christmas or any other special occasion!
Prep Time: 10 minutes
Cook Time: 30 minutes
Chilling Time: Overnight
Total Time: 3 hours 40 minutes for prep, cooling and baking. Chill in fridge overnight.
Servings: 16 slices
Calories 470.0kcal
Ingredients
FOR THE CAKE:
1 (15.25 ounce) box yellow cake mix
3 eggs
⅓ cup vegetable oil
1 cup water
1 cup sweetened flaked coconut
1 (15 ounce) can cream of coconut (such as Goya or Coco Lopez brand)
1 (14 ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
FOR THE FROSTING:
16 ounces frozen whipped topping (such as Cool Whip), thawed
1 cup sweetened flaked coconut
Instructions
FOR THE CAKE:
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Spray a 9 x 13-inch baking dish with cooking spray and set aside.
In a large bowl, mix together cake mix, eggs, oil and water. Beat for 2 minutes on high speed, and then gently fold in coconut. Pour batter into prepared dish. Bake for 30-35 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the cake comes out clean.
In a medium bowl, combine cream of coconut with sweetened condensed milk and whisk until smooth.
While the cake is still warm, use a fork to poke holes all over the top. Slowly pour the condensed milk mixture over top, gently spread it with a spatula, and allow it to soak into the cake. This looks like a lot of liquid, but it will gradually absorb into the cake -- just go slowly. Allow the cake to cool completely on a wire rack -- it will continue to soak up the liquid as it sits, cover and put cake in fridge.
Leave cake in fridge overnight, prepare the frosting and top with coconut in the morning or before serving.
FOR THE FROSTING:
Spread whipped topping over cake. Sprinkle with coconut.
Refrigerate until ready to serve.
** Let me know how your coconut cake adventures go when you try this recipe!
This peek into Kim’s world was brought to you by Emily Kamala. Emily is a freelance writer and life coach who loves to share stories, write blogs, and experience life so fully she has to bring it to life on the page. If you’re interested in reading more of her work, you can visit: www.EmilyKamala.com
Kim Morgan has brought her passion for connecting and telling stories through photography to life. Her ability to put you and your family at ease is so palpable you don’t even realize she’s behind the camera getting those precious moments for you to carry with you many years later. She lives in Colorado with her husband, son, and dog, where they enjoy exploring the mountains and laughing at every opportunity. Her website is KWDesignsPhotography.com to see her amazing work and set up your session!